Adventures with two...

Popsicles

 

Eli just can't eat a whole popsicle, I think it's too cold for his liking.

Emily takes advantage of this every time!

Good 'ol summer fun...

    No time to post because we're having too much fun getting to know our newest family member. Life is good.

One Month Home!

Our sweet boy has officially been home for one month! An official US citizen for one full month!! We  continue to learn that this boy is a GEM! We can’t believe how sweet and funny he is. Adventurous, daring, humorous, extraverted and pure of heart.  He has adjusted so well and has won the hearts of everyone he has met. 

After one month, just four weeks, he seems to be understanding so much. He does three signs: “more”, “where?” and “all done”. Usually “more” means that he wants something to eat, “more” of anything will do! He is also saying several English words: Mama (which is the same in Cantonese), Dah-dee, Emmie, Puppy, Kitty, peek-a-boo, more (said with the sign), poo-poo, cracker, cheese (as in smile for the camera!) and hi. He is starting to mimic words more each day.

Eli is a Mama’s boy, which I of course love to no end. He would snuggle for hours and quite often does. The good thing is that it’s not in a clingy, demanding snuggle-it’s just a sweet little snuggle with lots of eye contact. He was definitely loved well by his foster families, and has so much love to give! He does well with Daddy, Nana and others, but if Mama’s in the room, no one else will do!

Actually, there is one other person who will do, Auntie Carrie, who he has adored since the day he arrived. It was as if he had known her all of his life. He is always sad when she leaves. Even though we only see her once a week or so, he never needs a moment to warm up to his Auntie Carrie.

Eli adores his big sister and when she is at school (just two days a week), he often walks around the house, signing “where?” and says, “Emmie? Emmie?” He is always SO exited to see her and be around her. He would hug her all day if she’d let him, which she definitely would not! She has warmed up to him a lot in this month, and has even kissed and hugged him a few times without prompting. Her patience and flexibility remind us that she is truly an amazing girl.

A few nights after being home I told Eli, “Wo Ai Ni” which is “I love you” in Mandarin. I hadn’t thought to say this to him since I figured it was totally different in Cantonese, which he understands. His face lit up and broke into a big smile. He snuggled into my arm saying, “oi nei”. It seemed that he understood what I was saying! I looked up how to say I love you in Cantonese, you say “Ngo Oi Nei” and it sounds quite similar to “Wo ai ni”. We have had this little "I love you" exchange and snuggle everyday since. It is so sweet and melts my heart every time. It also makes me so happy that our boy was told he  was loved often enough that he knows how to say it and just what it means!

One month after being home and we are still convinced that we are the parents of the sweetest, cutest children on the planet. We are so lucky to be their parents!

Home two weeks...

Trying to find the time to fit in blog updates...it's trickier with two!! Duh.

Eli checked out well at the pediatrician, though he is a peanut! 20th percentile for height, 10th for weight and 3rd for head size on the American charts. Em has always held strong at the 60th+ percentiles. No wonder he feels so tiny, he is! 

The eye doctor appt. went well too. He definitely has a "lazy eye" or more accurately "exotropic strabismus". His eyes aren't actually that bad, about 20/40, so we are starting with an eye patch to see if we can strengthen his eye muscle. He wears the patch for two hours, first thing in the morning. He has done GREAT with his patch! I thought he'd be ripping that thing off every ten minutes, but he does fine with it.

All in all, things are going well and we are settling in nicely. The hardest part of everything for me has been the fact that for two years we worked hard to be sure that Emily attached well to us and we created routines and rituals for her to feel safe and secure. She hasn't had any attachment issues, but now that we are wanting to foster attachment and bonding with Eli, it's hard to stick to the routines that our sweet girl is used to. She has been amazingly flexible in the whole process, but I'm racked with guilt as I sit rocking Eli and she is laying in bed whimpering, "Mama, rock me."

The current routine goes something like this: We head upstairs and get pj's on, brush teeth, etc. Then we read a book, the three of us if Tom's at school, or Em and Daddy, Eli and Mama if Tom is home. After books I rock Eli and Em reads in bed. Once he's asleep I whisper to her and she comes over to rock a bit more with me and then I sing her a song, tuck her in and rub her back for a minute. Some nights this all goes smoothly. Other nights, not so much. Luckily Eli hasn't had any true sleep issues. Yet.

The thing is, most siblings are added as newborns and all of these routines are established slowly as the baby grows up. I'm guessing it's not as jarring to the older sib. Anyone out there that added a sibling as we did? How did you figure out ways to do things to keep both kids feeling special? Even if you added a newborn, how did you do things for the older sibling?

One of the friends we traveled with wrote in an e-mail, "Oh the guilt of parenting..." and I keep reminding myself that you've got to give and take and nothing will be perfect. She should know, she has five kids!

I do think that overall we are having a very easy time. And when the kids are playing and laughing together we can't get enough.  Even better, it's summertime: swimming, ice cream, wagon rides, the park, tricycle rides...

Sleep, glorious sleep!

I didn't want to jinx it by posting that we had slept through the night after just one night...but now we've made it three whole nights! All four of us. Yippee!! I think the worst is behind us. You forget how necessary sleep is to daily life until you have a bought with jet lag!

But the best news of the week is that Eli went to visit the clubfoot doctor and need no further treatment! We had no idea that he would be doing this well as far as his feet were concerned. We are so happy that he doesn't have to be in casts for months on end. The brace he wears at nap time and night time will be enough to correct the last bit of turning that his toes do. We drove to see Dr. Ponseti at the Univ. of Iowa. Dr. P is 94 years old and still sees patients! He created the "Ponseti Method" for treating children with clubfeet by using manipulation and casting, versus surgery. He was a great guy and I'm so glad that we got to meet him! What an inspiration for doing what you love in life. He is sharp as a tack and simply felt and flexed Eli's feet and would tell the assistant, "26 degree...sub-flexation(??), 10 degree...blah,blah..." Years of practice and love. What an amazing doctor!

Thursday we'll go to see the pediatric opthomologist to check on what we can do about his lazy eye. I'm wondering if they will patch it or if he will need glasses?

Both Eli and Em are doing great. Em was back at "school" today and Tom went back to work. Eli and I ran to buy a gate for the top of the stairs, since as we've explained he has no fear of anything and feels as though he can take the stairs by himself. Our steep, wooden stairs with a big 'ol radiator at the bottom. yikes.

We enjoyed the weekend with Tom's brothers in town, along with Em and Eli's cousin, Cooper! Life is settling down and we are so content with the fact that we are the lucky parents of two amazing children. I have to keep reminding myself that Eli has only known us for two short weeks, because he is adjusting so amazingly well! 

We're home!!

We made it!! We had smooth sailing all along, luckily because a 12 hour flight is just nothing to look forward to. The kids were great, only a few points that caused worry, but they passed quickly. About 5 hours into the flight both kids were asleep and I told Tom that I wasn't sure if I would be able to make it 7 hours more. Yuck, long flights stink!!

We were met at the airport by Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Carrie. Plus at our house, Nana and Grandpa Bud were waiting along with Auntie Jen and Uncle Aaron, Uncle Dan and Aunt Evie and some of our neighbors.

Eli acts like he's been here forever and is still all smiles. He has especially enjoyed the backyard and the sandbox!

The kids slept well last night, waking up once and we all went down for oatmeal in the dark and went back to sleep. They woke us up at 8:30am so we are hopeful we're on the right track.

It's 10:15 and I've fallen asleep 3 times trying to write this, so I'll throw on a few pictures and try to get some more thoughts down over the next few days.

Good night!

Final Photos from China

Here are a few shots from the last day in China. What an amazing trip! We are glad that we brought Em with, even though it was difficult and there where moments when I was reconsidering what we had done. I am glad however that she got to see the whole process of meeting Elijah and that she was able to experience China before she is old enough to be judgmental. At this point in life, she loved it and doesn't have any bad thoughts about China, only more love. Hopefully we are able to enjoy China many more times together as a family.

Red couch photos (don't you love our little emperor?), our whole group at the White Swan, a photo of all of the children adopted in our group and photos of Em and Eli on the couch...as you can see, they weren't totally on board with the photo shoot.

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Where does the time go??

I swear, once you hit Guangzhou, the time simply evaporates. It must have something to do with the humidity and rain that has plagued us since we arrived. Guangzhou is a sub-tropical city and it has been just as drippy and hot as Guilin and Nanning, though after a rain it feels rather nice.

Anyway, we got some fun shopping in, good eats and we are MORE than ready to be on our way home tomorrow bright and early. Tom says he's never looked forward to a 4:30 wake up call so much!

We did the red couch photos this morning and photos with our whole travel group. Then three families went to the Six Banyan Trees Temple and had a blessing for our kids. It was really neat, just like last time. We came back for lunch and then tried to get the kids down for a nap to no avail!

We then headed to the American Consulate and had our swearing in ceremony, where we took an oath promising that what we had filled in on our paperwork was true and that we would never harm or abandon our lovely child. An easy oath to commit to.

We had the evening off and tried to finish up some last minute shopping, but we are so done with buying trinkets and such that we didn't really buy that much. Yesterday a few of us took a bus over to the "Up and Down Number 9 Street" and I found some good buys and of course some pearls.

A few random photos from the last few days...no red couch photos yet, it's too late to download and I need to reconfirm our tickets!! One photo is of Eli thinking he is funny by sticking Em's undies on his head. Another is of the welts on Em's legs from bug bites. Ouch!

If you would like to meet us at the airport tomorrow...Wednesday, July 2nd at 12:35 in the afternoon we will be arriving on Northwest Airlines. We will also be having people over at our house so if you would like to stop by to meet Elijah and share some words of wisdom with his big sister, we would love to see you! We are hoping to keep the kids awake for most of the afternoon, so that we can get on a good schedule and work off the jet lag!

Can't wait to see everyone again. xoxo

The Jeep

A post by Daddy!!

To paraphrase Elaine Benes, the male body is no thing of beauty. It’s made for gettin’ around – like a Jeep. After a coupla days with this little fella, I’ve come up with no better term to describe him than “Jeep”. The kid bounces around like a pinball, with no regard for life or limb (his own or those of others), and all the while smiling and laughing like a damn fool. Spills and wipeouts that would have Em bawling and requiring a minimum of 3 Elmo band-aids and 5 “Miyagi’s” don’t even register with this kid. I swear to God, he’s like the terminator crossed with the 4th stooge. We’ve already accepted the fact that there will likely be multiple trips to the ER – we’re just crossing our fingers that we can at least make it back to the States before the first.

For those of you who know Em, you know that this is not exactly her style, to put it mildly. So there have been a few ups and downs. At times she is absolutely disgusted and horrified with his displays of unbridled primal behavior – imagine Strawberry Shortcake sitting in the front row of WrestleMania. In the long run, I really think it will be good for her, having a rambunctious little brother to toughen her up a bit. But for now, his maniacal fits of exuberance invariably end with her slightly over-dramatized and tearful pleas to “give Eli a timeout” or to simply “get him away from me”. So our new family dynamic has become a balance between trying to tell a 19-month old Jeep to simmer down and telling a 3-year old Princess to grow up. Needless to say, we’re 0-for-2 at this point …

All that being said, there are definitely times when Em cherishes her new role as big sis. At least a dozen times each day she instructs mom and dad to “tell Eli to watch his big sister (fill in the blank – peel her own banana, do a somersault, take off her jammies by herself…” And it is obvious that little brother adores his big sis, and could just eat her up (literally). And Mom and Dad are doin well, too – adjusting to the new lifestyle, and for the most part getting a big kick out of it. We’re traveling with 3 families who are well beyond our paltry 2-kid stable – so that keeps us pretty grounded and aware of the reality that this really ain’t so crazy after all.

Oh yeah – we went to the Guangzhou Safari Park yesterday. Gotta be one of the best zoos around. Unfortunately (or fortunately, from a memorable-event standpoint) we got stuck in an absolute monsoon rain while we were there. At this very moment, there are no doubt countless families across Guangdong Province telling their friends and families about the crazy herd of white folks with Chinese kids running around in the pouring rain without even the good sense to open up a stinking umbrella. And I’m proud to say we were part of that crazy herd …

Guilin to Guangzhou

(The monkey photo should have been with yesterday's set of photos...oops! Poor monkey...poor Tom, the monkey's behind left a little something behind. (Think Gracie the cat at Christmas!!)

We set off early this morning, early as in 5:00 wake up call. Our flight was only about 45 minutes, the shortest flight ever for us. Which was a really good thing because Eli was a SPAZ with a capital S!!!! He squirmed and wiggled and hollered the whole way. I’m happy that airplanes are noisy and for the most part people can’t hear you more than a few aisles away. It made me super nervous to know that we have 17 hours of flying ahead of us on Wednesday. Gulp!

When we got in to the hotel, we dumped our bags and ran down the street to the medical examination. There weren’t any families in the room at the time and our guide began to explain the procedures. Little by little other families were filing in and within 10 minutes the place was a zoo. You see, when newly adopted children need to lay on tables naked for doctors/strangers it causes great alarm! Everyone in the place knew the wonder of our son’s lungs by the time we finished with the doctor. I remember Em looking at me the same way he did, like “Mom, why are you letting them do this???” Poor thing!

Afterwards, we had lunch and got the kids down for a nap. I then went down and filled out the rest of the paperwork with other parents from the group. We had to complete all of the paperwork for the American Consulate, line by line, and there are about 15 papers and forms to complete. It took us 2+ hours!!

When I got back we set off to enjoy Shamian Island and ate some dinner. We did dinner at “Lucy’s” an American-style café, even though we weren’t that impressed the first time we were here. It was fine tonight, and we learned that Eli likes spaghetti, which is great because it’s a staple at our house.

When we got back to the hotel we took a dip in the rooftop pool overlooking the city of Guangzhou. The kids loved it! We decided however that we will always be completely wary of taking Eli to the lake or pool. The child has no fear and wants to jump in with or without us. He just walked to the end and stepped in. Luckily I was hanging on to his hands! Life jacket for that one for sure.

We laughed because there was a little “foot pool” where you basically walk through to get to the big pool. I’m sure it’s just to rinse of your feet before you get in. Em was saying sweetly to us, “You guys can sit here in this little pool with me and swim around, want to?” Meanwhile, Eli is shrieking with glee about the pool. Shrieking, LOUDLY! He’s bombing into the deep end and she is quietly flitting about in the two inches of foot bath water. Tom looked at them and said, “Yep, this pretty much sums up our children!”

I hope those who are close to us realize that there will be no more peace and quiet when we come to your homes because we will be arriving with Trouble!! You will love him to pieces and he will dazzle everyone with his charming personality, but quiet? Calm? Relaxed? Nope!! Not gonna happen!

I feel like he was really grieving more today when I put him down for a nap and for bed time. He is also really not wanting Tom to hold him. Which is difficult and a bummer. He is however starting to call us and use some English words. He says, “Daddy” “Emmie” “Mama”…more like “Maa,MAAHHH!!” (again with the loud exuberance or tearful screaming, depending!) He also says, “tickle, tickle” and “I did it!” which Tom taught him to say when he does a trick, but he says it whenever anything is funny. Which makes us laugh to no end.

Em had a great day today, even though she struggled at the airport for a bit…lack of sleep I’m sure. A few more minutes and I would have been close to a tantrum too. But later she got to sit by the big kids in the bus and that made her day. Luckily she also got to hang out with Riley, another new friend, during the medical exam. She’s acting more and more like her true self, which is great.

So far we are enjoying our time at the Victory, loving our big suite, although we are so excited to be making our way home soon. Even more so, we’re still in awe of the two most amazing children that fill our hearts to the brim!